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Curling – The Ultimate Futuristic Female Game

February 15th, 2006

So last night after work I met some fellow co-workers at this “sports bar” called Dugans between the
office and my hotel room.. My friend / co-worker Sue was in town as well, so we at least had someone to hang out with.. I head over to this “sports bar”..
I park, and walk up and can smell the moldy dankness as I turn the corner to head to the front door.. Walk in the door and see a bunch of crappy pool
tables, and a bar complete with the finest of beers on tap.. Bud.. Bud Light.. Bud Select and something else.. The music is the Columbia K97.5 station..
Booty jams 24/7.. A little Kanye West thrown in for good mix, but you should start to get a good picture of what this place is like.. The 4 of us split a
5 dollar pitcher of Bud.. They don’t have enough pint glasses, so two of our group has to drink out of highball glasses..

Sue had them put Curling on the TV so we could finish watching the Japaneese and USA women.. I barely understand the game myself, but Sue starts
explaining it.. This incredibly high dude walks over and starts rambling about how he loves that game with the “you know..”.. He starts makign a sweeping
motion with his hands.. His name turns out to be Steven Tony.. He had dreds, and sort of reminded me of a parliment reject.. He started telling Sue how he
liked it when the women swept.. He also had this strange facination with the movie Blade (which I recently saw on TNT for the first time in years) or just
everlasting life in general.. He said one of the guys I was with looked “like the dude from blade”.. I have no idea which one.. It could have just been
cause all white people look alike, cause I didn’t see any resemblance to anyone in the movie.. The older guy Dean who was with us was “about 10 centuries
old” according to Tony.. He didn’t say anything about me or Sue..

He kept asking for some of Deans blood so he could live forever.. He also propsitioned Sue for her blood, but she didn’t give him any.. I wanted to get a
few drops of his blood.. I figured that would easily get my high for a few weeks.. Twoard the end of our stay at Dugans this guy with no teeth comes over
an started asking if he could borrow 2 dollars.. I was waiting for the typical story “I need to borrow 5 bucks so I can get back to Winston Salem thats
where my wife and kids are and my car is outta gas” story.. Nope.. This guy wanted to borrow 2 dollars so he can bet on his pool game.. He claimed when
he bet money he played better.. I don’t know why we kept meeting these interesting people, but we decided after 2 pitchers it was time to go..

We tried to eat at Outback which had a 2 hour wait, and went an actual sports bar that had 2 dollar black and tans, and a horrible patty melt.. We get
back to the hotel, I have a few more beers and fall asleep.. I woke up at 4am with all my clothes on, lights off, and some local bible show on TV.. After
fumbling for the remote I turn off the bible dude and go back to bed..

So in Columbia, SC don’t be fooled by the name.. Dugans has nothing Irish about it, and I don’t see how its a “sports bar” at all..

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