Archive for October, 2005

Rollergirls tailgating?

October 30th, 2005 Comments off

Miss Tori and I had talked about trying to do some tailgating before the roller derby bouts.. Any
interest from anyone?

Categories: Random Tags:

The sound of gas powered yard tools

October 25th, 2005 Comments off

this weekend reminded me I ought to post this in case any of you ever forgot how shitty Cary is..
This is pretty old, but its a fucking riot..

So I went out to Arizona to see a friend for a few days. When I get back in the mail I have a
certified letter waiting.. So I go and pick it up that afternoon at the post office and this is what I got..

What so funny about all of this is that I had mowed my lawn
before I left and the grass was still 6 inches (well within the 8 inch limit stated above).. I also had 3 days left to fix the yard and I had no idea what
the fuck was wrong since its a vague as shit form letter.. I called up the worthless town of Cary and decided I would be nice instead of initially saying
“What the hell is your problem.. Do you have so little important to do that you mail out letters about lawns not being up to snuff?”..

I end up
leaving a message for some assclown there and finally the next day I get a call back.. He says he has no idea what is wrong with my lawn, but that I was
on “his list”.. (Think of L7 – Shitlist).. I tell him I really need to know whats wrong becasue I want to fix it so I don’t have to deal with this
bullshit again.. We go back and forth on that a few times, and then I ask “So how does the town of Cary determine what properties get letters? Neighbors,
The Cops, or do you pay people to drive around and look at yards”.. I figured I was just being a smart ass, but he told me “Well sir actually its all of
the above..”, to which I ask him “So you are teling me the town of Cary actually PAYS people to drive around looking at yards?”, and he tells me that is
the case..

So at this point I am starting to get mad and tell him that if he can’t tell me whats wrong with my yard I will just make a guess and
if thats not good enough that I am not going to pay for whatever yard service they provide for a minumum fee of $100.. I also tell him that I really don’t
know if I will be able to get it fixed by the deadline becaue its raining and that I was on vacation the last few days.. He then tells me in a very joking
way “Sure sure you were on vacation”.. At which point I say “Listen you spent my tax dollars to send me this stupid letter about my yard certified and you
don’t know when I picked it up at the post office?”.. At any rate then he was appologetic.. I pulled a few weeds out of my yard a few days later and
never heard back from them..

Moral of the story.. NEVER LIVE IN CARY unless you are a yard nazi and have no soul.. It also was the final straw
that said there was no way I could keep my sanity and live here any longer.. Now I just have to finish up my remodeling projets and sell this place..

Categories: Cary House, Rants Tags:

It’s FINALLY feeling like fall

October 23rd, 2005 Comments off

It’s about damn time.. All this summer shit needed to end.. Nothing like watching a movie on the couch
with a blanket and some alcohol.. Maybe because we are up to tropical storm Alpha we will get a nice winter.. Who am I kidding its North Carolina..

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Monday Night Football!

October 12th, 2005 Comments off

OK after some discussion it has been decided..

Monday Night Football at my place next monday in HD on my sickly large TV..

If you don’t like football it should still be a good time.. Lawnjesus and I had a great time this monday wondering what the angriest football coach in the
history of the world was thinking..

If that isn’t enough to get you out.. How could your week not be complete with more of the “I like it.. I love it.. I want some more uv it..” song at

If you kids want to do the fondue thing I am more than game.. Email me and let me know you are coming and for directions if you don’t know where I live..

Who: You!
What: Monday Night Football!
When: Anytime after 7:00 10/17/2005
Where: My House in Cary..
Why: Need there be a reason?

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Wallpaper is a great way to get a divorce

October 9th, 2005 Comments off

In an effort to use my blog on the Murdoch owned MTV replacement addiction that is worse than crack I
bring you my latest insights into life..

When I worked at Media Play in High School I had a manager who told me the best way to get a divorce was do to a project with your spouse involving
wallpaper.. Now many years later it has all become apparent what he was talking about..

For those who don’t know me very well I own a house in Cary (Don’t ask thats a *LONG* story).. The people that owned the place before me loved plastic
gold and the white on white on white theme.. Not really to my taste.. After some long period of procrastinating I decided I was going to do something
about my hospital themed home to (A. keep my sanity while I still live here so I don’t think I am in Dorthea Dix B. Fix up this place so I can dump it and
move somewhere where I want to be (5pts?)).. My favorite deocating from the previous owners was the wallpaper in the master bath..

Point being I have been taking that crap down.. I do not wish this pain and suffering on my worst enemy.. So if you are in a relationship and want a cop
out reason to split I would suggest doing a project involving wallpaper.. I have done other home improvement projects and nothing compares to the mundane
agrivating crap that removing wallpaper and scrubbing glue off of drywall is.. Laying tile isn’t even close to this level of frustration..

At least I have made some progress.. Too bad there is no Neu Romance tonight it would be a nice break after hours of wall scrubbing..

Categories: Cary House Tags:

The new NHL is gay

October 6th, 2005 Comments off

After they argued about money and lost and entire season the NHL is finally back.. I got to watch
“history in the making” according to the moronic announcers on TSN last night.. The Leafs and Sens had the first shootout to decide a game.. What was SO
wrong with a tie? It seems so sacrilegious. Why do they have to keep fucking up the game?

On a positive note I finally watched hockey in HD! Man that shit rocks! If anyone wants to come over drink and see some hockey in HD with me anytime let
me know..

Categories: Rants Tags: